


What about me?

by plazorr



Series: After the disband [4]
Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: F/F, F/M, Post-Canon, no spoiler in the tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 09:35:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20794499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plazorr/pseuds/plazorr
Summary: 1 year after µ's disbandedHonoka graduates alongside Umi and Kotori, but her mind is full of doubts.





	What about me?

**Author's Note:**

> This one comes 2 months after the previous one because i've been very busy in August and September because of my exams. I had to work a lot for that, but it's finally behind me and i can't continue this story faster. Ok, i admit it, i also spent an immense amount of time playing Fire Emblem 3 Houses (btw this game is a masterpiece, go get it ^^)  
Anyway, i think the wait for the next chapter shouldn't be as long as the time between the previous and this one. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter :)

« Thank you everyone! Those years here, at Otonokizaka, we will never forget them!”  
The students assembled in the hall started to applaud louder at Honoka’s cheers. She was seeing a smile on each face and, for a moment lost in time, in this beloved place, she saw all she had done in the past years flash again before her eyes.  
She, along with the other members of µ’s had saved this school. They had won the Love Live competition and lit a candle that would lead the way for future idols. They became national celebrities for a few weeks. That was funny once the scary part passed, she thought. Now, Eli and Nozomi were studying at some university and Nico had created a new group as a manager. But now, it was her turn to start to move to a new goal. Of course, it was the same for Umi and Kotori, but those two already knew exactly what they would be doing. That was not the case for Honoka.  
“My final duty as student council president will be to announce who will be the one to take that position from now on. After discussing it with the potential candidates, I decided that the one who will be Otonokizaka’s student council’s president will be Alisa Ayase! Please welcome her warmly!”  
Everybody started applauding again and, this time, Honoka and the other 3rd years joined them as Arisha made her way to the center of the stage and Honoka stepped back to go back between Umi and Kotori. They watched as their friend’s little sister started her own speech.  
“She really did grow up.” Kotori whispered with a smile.  
“Yes…” Honoka answered just as softly. “They grow up so fast…”

The ceremony was done and everyone was waiting for the dinner that would come after to begin. The room was loud, but Honoka and Kotori were discussing together while Umi was in the bathroom.  
“Honoka! Where are you?”  
The girl froze in place. That angry tone, the emphasis on the first part of her name, those could only mean one thing: Umi had seen her final results and was about to scold her because they were the lowest successful ones in the class. She looked at Kotori with a spark of fear in her eyes.  
“Can you win me some time while I hide, Kotori?”  
“I’ll do my best, Honoka-chan. I owe you that after all.” She answered with her signature smile.  
Not paying a lot of attention to her friend’s enigmatic words, she started to run away while waving something supposed to mean thanks. She navigated inside the crowd to avoid being seen by her blue-haired friend. She got only noticed by a woman that asked her about a girl, but Honoka didn’t really pay a lot of attention. The woman continued her way while she made her own out to the outside. Honoka took a few seconds to look at her surroundings.  
It was a bit cloudy, but it didn’t seem like it would start raining anytime soon. The trees were blooming and some petals were on the ground all around. There wasn’t anyone around so she just started to walk alone around the school a bit, lost in thoughts.

This place was filled with memories and it was not easy to move away from them. However, Honoka knew she was more concerned about entering the adult world than leaving this place. She was supposed to take the lead in her family’s bakery in some time, but this was not what she wanted. On the other hand, she knew after speaking with her that this is what Yukiho wanted. From that point, it seemed logical to her that her sister should be the one that should inherit the family business once the time comes. Everyone agreed last month this was what should happen and everyone was happy about it.  
However, Honoka’s future was not as clear anymore. She didn’t know what she should do now, unlike her friends who also succeeded at Otonokizaka this year.  
Kotori was noticed by a talented European designer and he asked her to become his apprentice. Honoka didn’t want to keep her from her dream of becoming a successful designer again and she showed her a lot of support when she told Honoka and Umi about it. The ex-leader of µ’s knew that this was what her friend wanted to do. Kotori always loved designing not only outfits for their performances, but also clothing in general. Seeing her grow her wings and join the world of fashion was the natural thing for her.  
Umi, on her side, wasn’t supposed to travel so far just yet. She had been accepted to a university where she would study to become a journalist. Honoka expected her to become a writer or a novelist, but her friend said that journalism was a safer bet. She wanted to write for her living and this was the best way she could think of. She may have preferred to inherit the Sonoda dojo, but the modernization of the city seemed to threaten it. Umi said that this was how life was supposed to be, that not everything lasts forever and, with a spark of a somewhat sad laughter, that she couldn’t create a club of dojo idols to save that place.  
As she was walking without thinking about her destination, Honoka was wondering what would happen of herself now. She didn’t really want to sing to earn money as her voice belonged to µ’s. There was also some guy that asked her to play in his movie. She said she would think about it, but Honoka thought she was too clumsy to become an actress. She really couldn't see herself on those big screens in the cinemas all around the country .She was already impressed she didn’t forget her lyrics or her dance moves during one of their lives. She also didn’t want to go to a university because, seeing her final notes, it was clear theory was not her forte and that she should avoid going back to the student role as much as possible. Her future was not looking bright from her point of view.

Honoka snapped out of her thoughts as she heard someone crying. Her stepped had led her to the music room and the sound was coming from the inside. She walked to the door to look inside. There, in the middle of the room, was a little girl around her 4 years crying at a broken instrument. It seemed obvious to Honoka she had come here without her mother noticing and broke that thing in an accident. The child looked at her with tears in her eyes.  
“Hey there little one.” Honoka started with her most sincere smile. “How did you get here?”  
“Mama do not care about me. I do not care about mama.” The child answered with a try for an angry menacing face.  
“I see.” She said as she got closer.  
The little girl didn’t seem to trust Honoka coming close and she stopped as she noticed, putting her hands in front of her as a sign of peace. She wouldn’t come closer if the little girl doesn’t feel ok about it and just sat on the ground at a little under two meters from her.  
“I’m sure your mama cares about you.”  
“No, she only care about my sister: it’s all about her today”  
Honoka thought for a few seconds.  
“Is your sister … graduating today?” she said with some hesitance.  
“Mama said Sakura will get her ticket to be an adult today.” The girl said with a point of sadness. “But I don’t want my sister to be an adult.”  
“We don’t really choose to be adults, it just … happens.” Honoka answered.  
“It is poo-poo” the girl pouted.  
“Yes, it is poo-poo.” She answered with a laughter.  
The two of them stayed like that a few seconds, looking at each other.  
“My name is Honoka. What is your name?”  
“I am Kira”  
Honoka stretched out her hand to the child. Kira smiled first and then took a serious face as they shook her hand. She then put on a guilty face.  
“I am sorry to break the guitar, Honoka …”  
Honoka wasn’t the most cultured girl when it came to instruments. However, she could clearly tell the broken instrument was not a guitar. Maybe it was a violin? She really couldn’t tell with certitude.  
“Don’t worry about it, I know the girl it belongs to and she won’t be angry.”  
“Do your friend play the guitar?”  
“Not really, but she often plays that piano right there.”  
“Can you play the piano, Honoka?”  
“She showed me how to play a song, but I’m not really good at it yet.” She said a bit embarrassed.  
“Wooooooow” Kira said with a big smile. “Can you play that song for me?”  
At such a sight, Honoka felt she needed to try. She nodded, stood up and went to the piano with Kira following her. She sat on Maki’s seat and closed her eyes a second to focus. She opened them in surprise as she felt small hands grasping her legs to try to climb on her knees. Honoka smiled as she lifted the child so she could sit on her.  
Honoka let out a sigh as she was focusing to play the song Maki taught her. She wasn’t a great pianist, so she played the song slower than it was supposed to be. That said, she knew how she was supposed to sing it.  
“I saaaaaay” she started softly. “Hey! Hey! Hey start dash!”  
Honoka continued to play and sing her song with a calm voice. She was a bit disappointed because she knew she was still too slow and that she had missed a few notes or even added new ones where they weren’t supposed to be. She definitely still had a very long way to go before she could even dream of rivaling Maki. Kira didn’t seem like she had a bad time seeing her gigantic smile and the sparkles in her eyes.  
“You are amazing Honoka! Show me how to play.” She said as she put her hands on the keyboard, making a cacophonous noise.  
Honoka took the child’s hands with a smile in her own and used them to press the right notes. The rhythm was awful, but Kira didn’t care. In fact, Honoka didn’t either. They simply kept trying to play. She would never tell Maki about it, but Honoka felt this was the most beautiful “Start: Dash” had ever been.

They stayed like that for a while until red sunrays pierced through the room’s window. Even if it was already late when Honoka got in, she thought it was time for then to leave this place and go find Kira’s mother. She was about to tell that to the girl when she said  
“You want to be my new mama, Honoka?”  
She was a bit flustered, but quickly regained her composure.  
“Your mama would be very sad without you, Kira” she said as she stroked her hair.  
“No, mama always works. She’s never there to play with me like you.”  
“We can’t stay here forever. It’s time to go.”  
“Why?” Kira said with a few tears in her eyes.  
“Because things are poo-poo sometimes.” Honoka answered with a wink.  
The child laughed and stood up. She grabbed Honoka’s hand and they began to make their way back to the dining hall, where everyone should be attending at the celebratory buffet.  
They made their way to the room’s entrance and stood there, looking for the mother. Eventually, a woman came running at them and Kira let Honoka’s hand go to run towards her. In the end, it seemed that Kira cared about her mama. The ex-leader of µ’s had no doubts about it obviously, but it was reassuring to see that scene nonetheless. Kira’s mother ended up being the woman she saw panicked while Honoka was running away. Maybe someone else would have connected the dots, but she didn’t pay any attention to her when she left. Some things never change, she thought. Honoka was about to leave them when the mother called her.  
“Thank you for finding Kira, miss Kousaka.” She said.  
“Oh, it was nothing really.” She said with some embarrassment on her face. “I’m just happy you two are together again.”  
“I don’t want Honoka to leave.” Kira said as she hooked on to Honoka’s waist.  
“My daughter seems to really like you.” The mother said with a smile. “My job keeps me very busy, it’d be nice if someone like you could keep an eye on her.”  
“That sounds awesome.” She said. “But I think I’ll have to start looking for ways to earn money now.”  
“You know, a lot of other parents have trouble with combining work life and being there for their children. It seems my own child, at least, likes you a lot and I’m sure others would too. They could pay you if you looked after our children.”  
Honoka was a bit surprised about what that woman was telling her. Could she really make a living from taking care of children? She had never considered that as she didn’t interact much with children in her daily life. Her parents didn’t know anyone with young ones and, from her friends, only Nico had little brothers and sisters under 10 years old. When she looked at Kira, she could sense something in her heart telling her this may be the right decision, the same feeling she had when she decided to become a school idol. However, her reason was telling her to not rush into this blindly.  
“I … I need some time to think about it.”  
“I understand. If you change your mind, here is my phone number.”  
“Ok, I’ll be sure to tell you if I decide to follow that way.”  
“Please do. As I told you, a lot of parents would be willing to put their children in your care. You have a very positive reputation from your work with µ’s. You can use it to be a successful child minder if you choose to follow that path. Goodbye miss Kousaka.”  
Kira waved at her as she followed her mother to go to a girl that just graduated. This was probably Kira’s sister. The big sister went on her knees and hugged her little sister. Honoka thought it seemed nice to have a sister that small. Yukiho was only 2 years younger than her, so she couldn’t really compare her own experience with theirs. She was about to go find Kotori when she heard a familiar voice behind her.  
“So, there you are!”  
It was Umi.

“I’ve been looking for you the last 20 minutes. Don’t you think I have better things to do than looking for your stupid fucking ass the day of my graduation?”  
“Wow, Umi. Those are shameless words from you!” Honoka said, shocked to hear Umi swear like that.  
“This shows you how worried I was…” she said, a bit ashamed to have let those words slip out of her mouth in fact.  
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have run away. But when I heard your angry tone, I thought you would kill me for barely passing the finals.”  
“Honoka, I am already happily surprised you succeeded. I don’t really care that the results are low as long as you get that certification.” She said bluntly. “You see, i discussed with Yukiho in the bathroom...”  
“Oh”  
“Honoka, I was angry because you didn’t tell me that she would be the one to inherit the bakery. How can I and Kotori help you if you keep it secret from us?”  
“Did you tell Kotori about it?”  
“It is not my role to tell her. It is yours.”  
“Thank you…”  
Honoka sat at a nearby empty seat and Umi sat next to her.  
“The thing is that I didn’t want to bother you two with my problems while you were busy with your own future.”  
“Say that again?”  
“You see, Umi, you were busy for the past weeks looking up stuff for that university and Kotori was going through the stuff to go outside of Japan. I didn’t want to be selfish again and keep you two from moving forward because I’d be keeping you back.”  
“This is the most stupid thing you have ever said and, believe me, you’ve said a lot of stupid things since we know each other.” Umi said with the shadow of a smile.  
“Why do you say that?” Honoka said in disbelief.  
“You talk about my future and Kotori’s future as if you shouldn’t be a part of it. That’s not going to happen, you know.”  
“But we are about to move to different directions and we’ll lose track of each other…”  
“That’s up to us to decide. We will only lose each other if we decide to. But as long as we want to stay together, even if we are far away from each other, we’ll be together.”  
Honoka leant against Umi’s shoulder.  
“In fact, I may have an idea about us two.” Umi continued. “My aunt has become too old to live in her house, so she’s moving out and she asked me if I wanted to live there now that I’m at the university. However, I think I’d feel alone there. I think I would need to live there with someone I appreciate. Maybe my good old redheaded friend would accept that? What do you think?”  
“What? Are you suggesting we should become a couple?”  
“Don’t take it the wrong way, but that’s disgusting. Two girls together? No, thanks.” Umi said with a truly disgusted face. “I’m asking my childhood friend if she would like to live with her childhood friend because being together is better than being alone.”  
“Well, that’s more like you, you had me worried for a split second.” Honoka said while pushing her hair to Umi’s face. “I’d like to live together with you. I’m sure it’ll be fun.”  
The two stood up and hugged each other. Things were starting to clear a bit inside Honoka’s head and the future seemed brighter again. They were on their way to rejoin with Kotori when Umi took the floor again.  
“And if you need to talk about your future career, if you need any help or advice, we will be there for you. Always.”  
“Thanks, Umi, but I already have an idea about that and, since it is very likely to impact our daily life, we’ll talk about it.”  
“Is this something I should be worried about?”  
“Probably not” Honoka answered, putting extra emphasis on the “probably” to mess up with her friend and, soon, roommate.


End file.
